The Lenten Journey

Day 16:   Abba, Can we Laugh Today?

Life has been hard for the last while.  I have had bouts of sickness from helping, doing, going, and leading.  After listening to my Abba yesterday, hearing Him say He wanted me to give Him the gift of TRUST, I asked Him if I could choose the gift I wanted to give Him today and – dumm dumm de dumm dum:  could it be  Laughter.  A picture of another blogger appeared on my screen and there was the face of Lucille Ball – my “wanna be”.  I have always aspired to be a “Smart Lucy” as the joy of my young life was watching I Love Lucy and laughing.  Plus, Proverbs 17:22 says that Laughter is Good Medicine.    When I saw Lucy's face I looked up and asked God –“Tomorrow may I give you Laughter?” 

Oh my antennae were up this morning when I got out of bed.  Every time I would try to talk with my man yesterday about the journey I was on, lo and behold tears would jump out of my eyes.  So, I’m ready to laugh – is that ok God, was my question.  I heard His voice.  TRUST!  I want you to TRUST me.  Excuse me Sir, didn’t we do that one yesterday?  TRUST! 

I’m listening Abba.  I’m quiet Abba.  My heart is waiting to hear.  It was then I sensed that stiring in my spirit of needing to deal with: – Am I really listening?    He is showing me that I really do not TRUST  Him unless things go as I want them.  I really do not TRUST that He is as good as He says He is.  I do not TRUST that He will supply all my needs.  I do not TRUST that He can handle any situation without me “mucking” in it. 

Ah Ha - the secret:  if I want to throw my head back and laugh, I must TRUST  Him.   He has already given me the picture of Him laughing on Day 10.  Oh my, maybe I will get it today.  It is when I TRUST Him that the burdens will not be my focal point.  Then I can join Him, throw back my head and LAUGH.   Only Trust Him, Only Trust Him, Only Trust Him Now!  He will save me from missing the joy of Laughing.

The Lenten Journey

Day 15:  Trust Me

I woke up singing Blessed Be Your Name by Matt Redman

Blessed Be Your Name In the land that is plentiful Where Your streams of abundance flow Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name When I'm found in the desert place Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise When the darkness closes in, Lord Still I will say Blessed be the name of the Lord  Blessed be Your name Blessed be the name of the Lord 

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name When the sun's shining down on me When the world's 'all as it should be' Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name On the road marked with suffering Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise When the darkness closes in, Lord Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord Blessed be Your name Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away You give and take away My heart will choose to say Lord, blessed be Your name

God has me thinking about when I choose to Praise Him and Trust Him.   I know in my heart it is generally on the days when everything is going like I want it.  Oh, I want to Trust Him when I have no understanding of what is going on.  I want to Trust Him to be all He says He is.  I want to Trust that He can and will do all He says He will do.  
The next step in my Lenten Journey is to know that I can’t trust myself – I’m like Peter in that I think I will stand strong but Jesus knows my weaknesses and my fears.  He is asking me to TRUST HIM in EVERYTHING!
This is my prayer:

The Lenten Journey

Day 14:  Accept Peace

OK, what is going on?  In this “Lenten Sacrifice” I thought I was going to be asked to give up something and concentrating on keeping my little hand open where God would take away “bad” stuff – food, drink – yes the “peanuts of life.”  However, what He is doing is asking me to grasp with my little hand all the good things He has provided!   Now, isn’t that just like God?  I want to live in the mentality of “Oh look at me, I am so spiritual that I gave up something for God” versus “Oh look at God, He is so wonderful He just keeps piling it on!”

Well, He did take another thing away yesterday -  Another “ministry” that I participate in.  I can hardly believe He has removed two “ministry” areas from my life in less than 4 days?  Oh my, I feel like He is striping me of what I perceive gives me identity.  Who am I if I don’t teach?  Who am I if I don’t lead?  Who am I if I don’t move with the spiritual movers and shakers?  Who am I?  My heart is about to burst because He is saying “YOU   ARE  MINE.  I have showered you with gifts and you have taken them but are not enjoying them."  (Side note:  that’s just like my mom and dad – I give them wonderful things and they put them in a drawer to save for special times – selah).   He is giving understanding of what His Lenten request is for me today:  "Baby doll, I want you to enjoy PEACE" – oh my here comes an acronym –

P  ractice

E  njoying

A  ssuredly

C  hrist’s

E  xtravagance

Oh my WORD – excitement is surging through my veins as I accept His gifts.   Oh I just have to sing:

My Jesus, I love Thee, I know Thou art mine;
For Thee, all the follies of sin I resign;
My gracious Redeemer, My Savior art Thou;
If ever I loved Thee, my Jesus, 'tis now.

I love Thee because Thou hast first loved me,
And purchased my pardon on Calvary's tree;
I love Thee for wearing the thorns on Thy brow;
If ever I loved Thee, my Jesus 'tis now.[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/r/religious_music/my_jesus_i_love_thee.html ]

The Lenten Journey

Day 13:   Count It All Joy

What a weekend!  What a surprise!  What confusion!  I “conflicted” with another person.  My spin was that I was trying to make things better!  But after the weekend was over, what really happened is:

·         I learned that all is not as it appears.

·         Grace and Love are stronger than being right.

·         You must have friends to help you – Like a Heron and Owl.

·         My best friend is my man, K Larry – He’s so smart.

·         My scrawny butte was saved!  I was getting ready to go somewhere He didn’t want me to go!

·         I had every opportunity to be angry, hurt, vengeful and un-Christ like.

·         I passed the test and am Rejoicing!

To top it off when I woke this morning, I heard the sweet voice of my Abba - that I absolutely love - saying: 

Count it all Joy, Baby doll – I saved you! 

How many times He has tried to save me I’ll never know until I get to heaven, but for today I have been saved from going somewhere I didn’t need to go.  Today He is asking me to bask in Joy – not because of what I did but what I allowed Him to do - that is profound. 

James 1:2-4 – Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides.  You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and show its true colors.  So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely.  Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.

And by the way, Abba – thank you for K Larry, the wise owl and the focused great heron, and yes the pelican too!  You are teaching me so much on this Lenten Journey – and definitely not what I thought I would learn – but BETTER!

I Love You God !!

The Lenten Journey

Day 12:         Acceptance of What God Has Provided

This Lenten Adventure is amazing me.  I began by asking the question:  “What can I give up for Lent?”  I then moved to: “What Does God Want Me to give Him or do for Lent?”  This is definitely not going in the direction I “presumed.”  Oh my, I am starting to taste “new wine.”  When I thought of giving up chocolate or wine, I wasn’t prepared for such  positive requests.  Would/Could/Should God say to me:  “My sweet girl, your little mindset is so negative.  You think I’m going to take something away, make you sacrifice, make you. . . blah blah blah!” – yes that is what it sounds like in my brain.  However, what He is showing me is that I don’t even begin to understand what He wants me to receive, how He wants me to receive it and what He wants me to do with it – if I choose to receive it.  I can put the Gift up on the shelf and tell everyone – “Look what God has given me!”  I can make it “religious” and not touch it, smell it, handle it OR I can unwrap the things He is showing me, touch them, taste them, smell them, listen for His real thoughts – Oh man, just Enjoy the gracious, wonderful, magnificent, phenomenal God that loved me first, chose me and sent His Son so that I could be loved to wholeness.  I choose to take this gift and grapple with II Peter 1:3 – Everything that goes into a life of pleasing God has been miraculously given to us by getting to know, personally and intimately, the One who invited us to God.  The best invitation we ever received!  We were also given absolutely terrific promises to pass on to you – your tickets to participation in the life of God after you turned you back on a world corrupted by lust.  He has shown me what Lust is:  Living   Under  Self  Trust.  (The Message Translation)
 I am going to do more than gaze at this Gift.  I am going to allow God to expand my little brain as to the enormity of what is included in this Gift.

The Lenten Journey

Day 11:  Acquitted of all Wrong Doing

I delved into John 3 this morning.  I wasn’t sensing where I would be led today because I am dealing with Island “Junk” that has my brain scattered and me questioning my motives and desires.  I wanted to ask God if He thought I could choose what I want to give Him today!   The answer was “no baby doll, I have a better idea than you.”  It was then that the light bulb went off in my head regarding all the mistakes and sins - intentional and unintentional - that I have  made,  which hang around in my head and rob me of the abundant life.  I have so many regrets wishing that I had been a better wife, a better mom and could/would be more understanding with my aging parents.  The old swirl of what ifs surfaced.  What if I had learned God’s assignment for my marriage earlier and handled the differences between Ken and me in a different way.  What if I had acknowledged that my kids weren’t mine to turn into little me’s – which I am comfortable with – instead of all the turmoil and trauma that I created by not understanding so many things about parenthood?  Well, I did the best I knew how but learning over the long haul that I cannot be perfect or “do it” perfect as there is only one Person who can claim that?  Well, for today I heard my Abba say:  “How would your life be different today if you truly believed that all your sins and the messes they have created are “Forgiven” or are only a prayer away from being Forgiven?   How would it be if He touched me with a magic wand and I turned into Snow White?  Oh my, I did take a bite out of the apple of “self will or ignorance or disobedience,” but God has and can take care of that completely and has or will pronounce:  Snow White – you are mine.  I am your Prince and I have come to rescue you and have brought you into a glorious life if You will accept this Gift.  Will you accept my kiss of Forgiveness?  Oh my, can it be as simple as choosing to live in the belief of I John 1:9 – If I confess my sin, He is faithful and just to forgive me All my iniquities and to cleanse me  of All unrighteousness!  Voila:  Snow White.  Yes I bit many apples but my Prince is ready and willing to give me the Kiss of New Life each day!  Now back to His desire for me today: “ Baby Doll will you live in Forgiveness – period!?”  OK, I’m no dummy!  I know a wonderful gift  when it is given and He is not asking me to do anything but accept a present from Him.  Oh Yes.  Signing off –

The Lenten Journey

Day 10:  A God Guide’s Day

Today is an Adventure.  Four of us ladies are exploring a whole day with God.  We are meeting for coffee and are then going to spend the whole day focused on allowing Jesus to lead us and be four little sheep in His flock.  I am so excited I can hardly stand it.  We have planned this for months and God is blessing us with a glorious day to Listen to Him.  My personality feels the need to “herd” everyone and keep us on track.  But I have heard my Abba tell me this morning that I am to listen and “flow with His Spirit”.  My mind wants to start orchestrating the day – where we will go, what we will do, yes!! I am a control freak but not for today.  Today I will focus on the joy that I feel by being with the “flock” and seeing where the Shepherd leads us.  I have my Bible, prayer journal, art tablet and pens, but most importantly – dumm dumm da dumm dum – a Quiet Spirit, A Listening Ear and Three Friends to go have a God Adventure with.  I am focused on my Shepherd – Jesus Christ.  Oh, have I told you I AM SOOO EXCITED

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