Day 33: Accept My Peace
I woke up and wanted to be focused - but I might add I am agitated this morning. One of my old friends is becoming totally incapacitated by Lou Gehrig’s disease; another of my new friends father was re-birthed into heaven yesterday; a fellow believer is causing havoc in life, and my Daddy is in my home for several days and is eaten up with “self” and “aging”. He also is eaten up with GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) which I inherited. Watching him be an old, self absorbed person is more frightening than dealing with the issues that I have considered “major” in my life (mastectomy, depression, raising teenagers, having my marriage be an example of Christ and His bride, etc.) I realize as I watch him that I have this inward dialogue (maybe more like panic) going on with God asking that He please help me remain a "gentle and quiet" woman. God has blessed me this Lenten season by requesting that I give Him the things I don’t need to “mess” with and accept the Gifts that produce Abundant Life. So, again this morning, I am “dealing”. Dealing with the things I have no control over, things I can’t change, things that cause anxiety if I allow my mind to go to those “mind fields”. Focusing on my Abba, I heard Him say: “Breathe Baby doll, regain focus”! Abba what do you want me to focus on? That’s when I heard my instructions:
Isaiah 40:31 But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, they run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind. (The Message) - (Or the King James version) But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
Yes Breathe – great gulps of God’s word. Refocus my brain – do not worry, be anxious, fear, judge, condemn, act snitty, or dare I say bitchy? But spread those wings Pattigail and focus on Abba; Listen to Abba; meditate on Abba’s Word and . . . la la la The things of earth shall grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace. La la la
Again, I am undone that I began my Lenten Journey to prove I could “give up” something for Abba and He has asked me to accept the things that blow this blond, senior citizen brain – like Watch Me Soar!!!