Do You Hear What I Hear?

Feb 2, 2011

Courage To Change

Are You Ready to Change?  I thought I was changing so much because I was reading my Bible, having quiet time. teaching - all the things a "nice Christian Woman" does.  BUT, it wasn't until I started working the Twelve Steps of AA that real change began in my life.  I am so encouraged to interweave my faith with the Twelve Steps because many times we feel that "knowing" the Bible is what it is all about.  Getting wrapped up in "teaching", even at times dogmatically, what the Bible says is not what it is all about.  As I have read Romans for the kazillioneth time, the answer finally registered in this brain and spirit of mine.  Faith without actions = ZERO!  I have read and re-read Romans 7 and 8.  However, putting steps 5 and 6 of AA with that has produced the miraculous.  Romans 7 affirms that my heart's desire is to be all God wants me to be.  So I have tried, tried, tried and wondered what can be the problem.  I have associated "trying" with "making it happen!"  As Paul says:  "But I need something more!  For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help!  I realize that I don't have what it takes.  I can will it, but I can do it.  . . My decisions such as they are, don't result in actions."  Pooey pooey.  Then I go on to Chapter 8 where it says:  "With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved.  Those who enter into Christ's being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud.  A new power is in operation.  The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing me from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny . . ..  Then - low and behold - as I was reading Courage to Change I found I had worked Steps 1 - 4 but when I got to Steps 5 and 6 - Whee Hoo - it showed me that I had to Admit to God, to myself and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs!  I don't mind admitting my "wrongs" to God but to another human being!  Yikes, that takes Courage.  But I put on my "big girl pants" and admitted to others how I had been wrong.   The Action that I was missing was Step 6 which is being entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.  I have tried tried tried to make myself do and be what I sensed was needed and now I wonder why it took me so many years to realize I CAN'T DO IT - ONLY GOD CAN.  The big question is do I have the Courage to accept Him doing it as a gift instead of keeping on trying so I can give myself "kudos" for being so wonderful.  I found the secret:  God is who He said He is and God can do what He says He can do.  I believe - just for today - I will accept what he wants to do and give Him the "kudos" or PRAISE and accept the fact that I don't have what it takes - but He does!! Hallelujah What A Savior.

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for sharing, Pat. I love reading about your journey.